Thursday, January 6, 2011

I Need To Be With You




I’m not sure how this started. Can’t quite pinpoint the exact moment when I first felt my tummy flip, my insides flinch and pull with uncontrollable want just thinking about you. Don’t know when this shifted from a playful flirtation, a fun but respectful flash of bare skin, giggles…lowering of the eyes just before things get too intense. Not sure how we got here but here we are and….I need to be with you.

I’ve gone over all the reasons why it’s wrong, sat in my comfortable bubble of familiar…tried to find resolve in the touch and smells of my commitment but now I find even when I’m safely tucked against the chest of my chosen one….you come to me. It seems that no matter how tightly I try and board up the little gaps you seem to find a way in, some little crack, a tiny unseen and unsupported doorway and there you are again. My eyes tightly closed, the fear of losing my way, my heart writhing and pounding against my chest….my breathing becoming more labored and desperate with each imagined and painfully ached for touch.



I’m afraid. Afraid of being found out, afraid of letting myself slip into a relationship that from the beginning has been based not on mutual understanding or paths to the future but on a primal, animalistic craving that holds me hostage to thoughts of devouring every inch….to draw from your well until this insatiable thirst for you is quenched. Afraid that once I surrender and first take you between my lips, feel your power land upon my tongue, afraid that once I swallow that thirst will become a part of me that I will never be able to completely quench…your moisture the only cure. I’m afraid but….I need to be with you.

So here I am....


Exposed

Vulnerable

Shaken

Terrified

Confused

Naked

Eager

Trembling

Yours….

I don’t care what anyone thinks…fuck, not even sure I care what I think but….I’m ready and I need to be with you.

On February 5th I board a plane at Los Angeles International Airport, the first step on this thirst quenching adventure that will have me landing in Venice Italy and from there, along with five other American wine bloggers on to the Eastern hills of Friuli to taste, explore and feel this new lover of mine.





Cannot wait…..



http://cof2011.com/

25 comments:

chris said...

How exciting!

Cannot wait to hear all about it.

Thomas said...

Friuli-Venezia-Giulia is a gem of a region, and please don't tell too many tourists about it.

Another Day of Crazy said...

Can't wait to hear about your new love-lust-passion...

do bring back recipes as well as impressions!

Do Bianchi said...

@Samantha I am so stoked that we will finally get to meet you and taste together! THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN! :)

middle child said...

Crap! I wish I'd remembered you were the wine girl. Then I wouldn't have gotten so excited!

Samantha Dugan said...

chris,
I am so freaking excited, you have no idea! I've been flirting around with Italian wines; started with the aromas in Barolo but the tannin and acid on young Barolo just rips my face off so I stayed away a bit but after a particularly thrilling lunch with a sexy beast of a Barbera I started dipping my toes in that pool again. Once I found Langhe Nebbiolo, oh I was done. My want has taken over and faithful be damned, going to Italy to wrap my desire around something new.

Thomas,
Okay I'll keep quiet but....um, I think that's why they want me to come there, to write about it and make people want to be there too. For you I'll keep it to the confines of this blog, I'm sure 13 extra visitors won't muscle in on your spot.

Another Day of Crazy,
Can't wait to share it with everyone. I travel for shit...oh, I'm on time and in a good mood but something always happens so I'm sure I will have plenty to share.

Jeremy,
Dude, thank you so much for tossing my name in the ring and rooting for me. I can't wait to meet you, Alfonso, David and Wayne...oh and the other guy I don't know yet!

Middle Child,
That elicited a rare laugh out loud from me. Sorry kid but you can still be excited...should be an amazing and powerfully lustful trip.

TWG said...

Don't excite the boys too much.

Samantha Dugan said...

TWG,
Meh, think they are impervious to my brand of...um, "charm" a couple of them know me too well by now. Should be lots of fun though.

V said...

omg! Have an amazing time.

Ron Washam said...

My Gorgeous Samantha,

I recognized the title of this post from an email I sent you. Which explains why you're fleeing to Italy with the Texas Mafia.

And you'll be in such distinguished company! That guy who writes "On and On and On and On the Wine Trail in Italy" is a hoot.

Yes, I'm jealous. Wish I were tagging along. Maybe you could stuff me in your luggage next to your panties. I won't make a peep.

I love you!

Samantha Dugan said...

Ron MY Love,
Well seeing as SOMEONE accused my underpants of tainting a bottle of Champagne I doubt I would subject you to having to spend the 14 or whatever hours next to them....humpf!

Thomas said...

In which village-town are you guys staying?

Samantha Dugan said...

Thomas,
Honestly I have no idea yet. I'm guessing more information will be coming forward on the project blog (the linkie thing at the bottom of my post) so I would post that question there or ask Jeremy. If not I will ask and let you know.

"On and On and On and On the Wine Trail in Italy" said...

Come on Ron, hide in the suitcase - forget about the Napa Valley Whiners Symposium

Thomas said...

Sam,

So, I went to the blog. It looks like you will get to spend time in Cividale del Friuli and that is THE PLACE!

Marvelous location, marvelous people, some good eating.

Don't know if Trieste is on the agenda, but I certainly hope you get a chance to visit that great city, too.

Ron Washam said...

Alfonso,

You didn't really think they'd let me in the NV Winey Writer's Conference, did you? I did get a nice note from Jim Gordon about why I wasn't given a fellowship. They're looking for "journalists" not humorists. So how did 1WineDoody get in? If he's a journalist, I'm Mike Grgich. No worries, I wasn't surprised or disappointed. What in the world would I learn from Lettie Teague or Karen MacNeil? Taste?

But nobody wants me in Friuli either, blog or no blog.

Samantha Dugan said...

Ron My Love,
Bullshit. I'd give anything to have you there.

John M. Kelly said...

Sam I'm seriously happy for you that you get to go! BTW - you suck. {jealous frown}

Those of us who know and love your writing can't wait to read about your adventures (well, I am at least). And those of us that know and trust your palate can't wait for you to find us something exciting to drink!

Samantha Dugan said...

Thomas,
Sweet! Now I'm even more excited.

John,
You are too sweet, well except for the whole sucking comment. I hope that I am able to do both, hopefully entertain a few of you and with all that lovely white wine around I'm sure finding something wicked cool to drink will be easy. Thanks for your sweet words and for following along. I adore you.

Thomas said...

Sam,

Don't rule out reds in the region: Schioppettino, Refosco, Refosco dal Peduncolo Rosso, Pignolo, Tazzelenghe, and some fine Cabernet Franc to be had, too.

Samantha Dugan said...

Thomas,
Oh I won't rule anything out....well there is my issue with offal, but other than that I'm pretty easy. I look forward to wrapping my head around the reds too but it seems that I just gots it bad for white wine so there should be plenty of stuff to please me for sure!

Joe said...

Sounds incredible. Can't think of many folks who are more deserving.

Please say hey to Jeremy for me. I don't know the guy well, but we've exchanged pleasantries a few times online, and I dig his blog. Seems like a cool cat.

Looking forward to you dropping some science on new gems I'll have to try.

Samantha Dugan said...

Joe,
Will do and I hope you follow along....

Tasleem said...

Oh my god! You totally had me there, because i didn't even read the title of your blog. Amazing writing! Wow! Totally sucked me in, and now I'm even more wanting to go to Italy... Didn't know wine tasting and travel could sound so seductive. Thanks for sharing!

Samantha Dugan said...

Tasleem,
Awe, thank you so much. Was very sweet to hear....made my day.